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November 20, 2006

ThinkGeek.com

Somehow I came across this gadget, which is possibly one of the most simple but evil devices ever conceived. Called the Mind Molester, it produces a one-second electronic chirp about once every 3 minutes. As the website indicates, "due to the chirp's duration, frequency, and sound characteristics, it's a very difficult, time-consuming, frustrating and maddening task to locate the unit. " Think of the cricket that starts up about 5 minutes after you turn off the light. However, since it doesn't have remote activation and starts 5 minutes after it's connected to the battery, you can't have this thing inflicted upon you completely anonymously. The perpetrator would have to be somebody who had access to your location in the past few minutes. So you have your list of victims for retaliation with the Sonic Grenade or the Airzooka Air Gun.

By contrast, the TV-B-Gone might be on the short list for the Nobel Peace Prize. It is a universal remote with one function only: power OFF. Holding down the button causes it to cycle through a range of power-off signals in 69 seconds. Ninety percent of televisions within 20 to 50 feet will be off within 17 seconds. So you can do something about the TV in the airport that is keeping you awake at 2am when your flight is delayed. Or the obnoxiously loud bar TV. Of course the bar tender might turn it back on, but if you are covert enough, you can keep turning it off until he gives up.

The Excuse Box seems cool, but it's probably more risky. It provides an array of ten background noises that give you an excuse to get off the phone, including: thunder, sirens, auto garage, crying baby, construction, plane boarding call, plane departure announcement, static, secretary paging you and operator breaking in.

But nothing says GEEK! like the Scrolling LED Belt Buckle. Texans are proud of their belt buckles, but how many of them come with a user manual? (And this manual is one of the best examples of Engrish around.) The buckle is 3.5" x 1.8" with onboard speed and brightness adjustments and programming buttons. It stores up to six 256-character messages.

2 comments:

kelly said...

I think a Mind Molester shaped like a cricket is something they should consider ( or you could beat them to the punch-- just dissect your fire alarm and--um, shape it like a cricket ?)

Brad Whittington said...

Yeah, that cricket connected to a 9V battery would be almost undetectible!!